[KOOGLE X] Why Sex Isn't as Important As You Think It is For A Successful Relationship

KOZZZY, May 23, 2017, 10 a.m.

Is sex REALLY important to maintain a successful relationship? If you’ve answered yes, the answer is actually no. Sex is not as important as you think it is in order to maintain a healthy relationship. The true answer is…well you're going to have to read on for that one~!

Society makes you  believe that the key to a healthy relationship, or in any relationship is sex. Sure sex allows you to connect intimately, but sex shouldn’t be the primary base of your relationship. There may be times where you will start to feel that all your significant other wants from you IS sex. Connecting with each other by openly talking about how you feel and actually speaking with your mind instead of your body will help you maintain a healthy relationship.

At this point, some of you may or may not agree with me, and that’s okay, because everyone works differently~

Anywho, filling in your emotional void with sex is also a HUGE NO. Your body is your temple, so giving up yourself to just anyone because of peer pressure or pressure from your current partner is not a viable reason for you to do something that you’re not ready for. Even if you’re in the heat of the moment, and you’re really unsure that if your partner is the one, then don’t do it.

Here are some tips that can help you maintain a healthy and successful relationship:

1. Communication

Communication is key. This goes for both men AND women when I say that beating around the bush, HOPING that your significant other will be able to guess why you’re upset with them isn’t going to help anyone or the situation. Yelling at each other where no one is listening will also not help. Take some time and sit down with each other and talk about it. If there’s an issue that took place at an outing with other people, then address the situation privately in the car or when you get home, so that your significant other can know why you’re upset and why it shouldn’t happen again. Communication really is key.

2. Put yourself in your partner’s shoes

Would you really be okay with some of the things you’re doing if your significant other was doing them as well? It’s important to put yourself in your partner’s shoes in order to help you have a better understanding of how they’d probably feel. For example, if you’re out at a party and you’re talking to the opposite who is slightly trying to hit on you, and you’re not taking any actions in order to prevent them from doing so and following along, would you be okay if the same thing was happening to your partner who is also not taking any primitive actions in order to prevent the other person from hitting on them as well? Relationships won’t work if there are double standards. You must always put yourself in the other person’s shoes in order to have a better understanding of what the feeling may be like.

3. Compromise

Compromising with your significant other may seem hard at first, but you can always start with the little things until they become almost habitual. For example, if you can’t choose where to eat, you can’t answer anything and turn down all of the choices that were suggested to you. Even during arguments, you must always find a way to compromise. It’s give and take. Even if it may not be the result that you want it to be at the moment, you can always take baby steps to resolve the situation.

4. Sex

Whether it’s make up sex, drunk sex, or just because sex. Sex should be a treat of the relationship. It’s an intimate connection that should be done for pleasure and not out of mere obligation. “Okay, well I’m not in the mood, but he wanted to, so we did it.” Sex should be when both are in the mood to do so. You DON’T ALWAYS have to have sex to maintain a healthy and successful relationship. Who do you really think you’re fooling? You can fool your mind, but you can’t really fool your heart.  

5. Arguments

It’s okay to argue. Arguing is normal. For some, arguing is a sign of falling apart. Arguing here and there is healthy, but if it’s constant fighting and arguing, then it may lead to a toxic relationship. If fighting and arguing is starting to become constant, then no issues are actually being resolved and you’re not listening to one another.  Try sitting down with each other, openly discuss what the issues were, listen to each other, and try to resolve them together. Emotions always gets the best of us, but if we are dating like adults, then we must act like adults. Watching your words when discussing the issues is also a huge topic. A lot of times, arguments ensue and drag out longer when the wrong word choices are selected. Think it through.

Many of us have different perspectives on how dating should work. I'm no love expert, but this is just from my perspective. Sex isn’t everything. It’s very important to touch base on this subject, especially to those who are peer pressured into it daily. Sex isn’t a necessity. It’s just a pleasure. A pleasure like eating a slice of cake at 12AM or sneakily eating a piece of fried chicken after you’ve already had your cheat day from your diet schedule. There are many ways to connect and make the relationship work, so don’t sell yourself short of sex and the thought that if you give in even when you know you shouldn’t, would make things better.

So what's the true answer to a healthy relationship? That answer wholly depends on you, but I can tell you now, it's not sex. 

I hope that this was a good read and that it was helpful for you~!


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